I did a search on college dating statistics and there was a whole lot more bad news than good news. Sprinkled in among the glaring date rape statistics were a few trendy stories about online dating, how hard it is to find a good date and how to pick up girls but mostly it was stuff like this:
♦ About one in three high school students have been or will be involved in an abusive relationship.
♦ Forty percent of teenage girls ages 14 to 17 say they know someone their age that has been hit or beaten by a boyfriend.
♦ In one study, from 30 to 50 percent of female high school students reported having already experienced teen dating violence.
♦ Teen dating violence most often takes place in the home of one of the partners.
♦ One of five college females will experience some form of dating violence.
♦ A survey of adolescent and college students revealed that date rape accounted for 67 percent of sexual assaults.
♦ It is estimated that between 20% to 52% of high school and college age dating couples have engaged in physical abuse.
♦ As many as 53% of college students have experienced at least one incident of dating violence
♦ 25% of college men surveyed admitted to slapping, pushing, or restraining a female partner
♦ 32% of college students report dating violence by a previous partner and 21% report violence by a current partner.
My friend Torri Griffin says that college students these days need a LiSENSE 2 DATE. That’s not just a license to date but a LiSENSE 2 DATE. That’s Dr. Torri’s Relationshpi Traianing Program that teaches ’how to use common SENSE to remove NONSENSE so your relationships make SENSE.’ She delivers advice through a local radio program, one-on-one coaching, small group programs and on college campuses.
What she says makes sense because the statistics above are nonsense! Wait! I take the back! These statistics do make sense. What can you expect when grow up with life-like video games where you sell drugs, pimp bitches and kill people that come back to life to score points – instead of Pong? What can you expect when you have the “Real Desperate Stupid Housewives of Wherever Stupid Housewives Live…” – instead of “The Cosby Show.”
You may think I’m wrong, but something is making young people act like this. If it’s not video games and reality TV, then it’s just bad parents. If it’s not bad parents, then it’s something they’re slipping in the food. If it’s not the food then it’s a government conspiracy. The finger-pointing could go on and on but fixing the blame is not nearly as important as fixing the problem and getting a LiSENSE 2 DATE is about fixing the problem.
The scariest part is that the statistics don’t get any better after graduation. It’s good to know that help is out there to fix a problem that should not be left to grow into the disfunctional realtionships of the future.
PEACE.
Rick Sherréll is the Blogitor (Blog Editor) here at CampusTalkBlog and agent for the college speakers at Pro Speakers Bureau. In his entrepreneurial life he has been a writer, editor, speaker, trainer, marketer, coach, IT specialist, consultant, event planner, broadcaster, fundraiser and innovator. Find out more at www.RickSherrell.com and www.ProSpeakersBureau.com/about.
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Rick, you know, I’m curious if these statistics include undocumented cases. It’s quite alarming that no matter how we run awareness campaigns against violence and abuse, things like this happen because you think that you’re somehow above these. Guess what? It can happen to anyone. No, I’m not trying to demotivate folks here. Like, recently, we’ve got this case where this girl got date raped and we’re lost on how to approach the subject. I hope good folks can chime in and offer a sound advice. The thing is: She doesn’t remember what happened to her. Maybe, a date rape drug got into her system. Moreover, I believe this person needs emotional support as well. Thanks for sharing these data anyway. Cheers!
Peggy, You’re not the only naive one. Too many parents and school administrators are also naive… or do they just have their heads in the sand?
I have a 13-year-old daughter and two young nieces. Is this what they’re in for? I have SIX sisters and I’m sure that at least two of them have been in abusive relationships – and that’s just the ones I know about.
BUT WAIT!!! Let’s not just point the finger at the guys! I’ve known of several relationships where the women ‘strike first’ – sometimes resulting in retaliation and sometimes not. No, 2 wrongs don’t make a right but it is important that we see the whole picture. Men AND women can fall into the abuser category.
A PRIME-TIME CASE IN POINT: As I watched the ever-deteriorating “Celebrity Apprentice” last night I was appalled at how Nene Leaks spoke to Star Jones. Not taking sides, but Ms. Leaks (whose charity is Women Against Domestic Violence) was totally verbally abusive and threatening. Star had to be concerned for her own physical safety. I found myself thinking, “Do you talk to your man like that?” If she does… that’s a form of domestic violence. It would be VERY hard not to physically retaliate when you can’t get a word in edgewise. I’ve got to think that the episode was a P.R. nightmare for her charity. Thanks to Star Jones for showing incredible restraint. Guys, take note!
The bottom line is, we have to teach our young people how to treat each other – to treat everyone – with respect. Not to change the subject, but we might want to teach our politicians the same. Don’t they know our children are watching?
PEACE.
Dang! This is depressing. I was speaking with a cousin a few months ago, and she couldn’t believe that I’ve never been in a relationship with a man who hit me. She was just shocked, and kept asking “what about…naming old boyfriends?” I was shocked that she was shocked. I’m so naive.